
PORT CHARLOTTE ~The funniest jokes, always have an element of truth in them.
A Somali arrives in Minneapolis as a new immigrant to the United States.
He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, "Thank you
Mr. American for letting me in this country, giving me housing, food stamps, free medical care,
and free education!"
The passerby says, "You are mistaken, I am Mexican."
The man goes on and encounters another passerby.
"Thank you for having such a beautiful country here in America !"
The person says, "I not American, I Vietnamese."
The new arrival walks further, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes
his hand and says, "Thank you for the wonderful America !"
That person puts up his hand and says, "I am from Middle East , I am not
American!"
He finally sees a nice lady and asks, "Are you an American?"
She says, "No, I am from Africa !"
Puzzled, he asks her, "Where are all the Americans?"
The African lady checks her watch and says..."PROBABLY AT WORK."
"OFFICE CLEANER...
"Compassionate Lawyer"
And you think lawyers don't have hearts. The best lawyer story of all time... bar none.
A local charity realized that it had never received a donation
from the city's most successful lawyer. So a charity volunteer
paid the lawyer a visit in his lavish office
The volunteer opened the meeting by saying, "Our research shows that even though your annual income is over two million dollars, you don't give a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give something back to your community through the local charity?"
The lawyer thinks for a minute and says, "First, did your research also show you that my mother is dying after a long, painful illness and she has huge medical bills that are far beyond her ability to pay?"
Embarrassed, the charity rep mumbles, "Uh... no, I didn't know that."
"Secondly," says the lawyer, "did it show that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair and is unable to support his wife and six children?"
The stricken charity rep begins to stammer an apology, but is cut off again.
"Thirdly, did your research also show you that my sister's husband died in dreadful car accident, leaving her penniless with a mortgage and three children, one of whom is disabled and another that has learning disabilities requiring an array of private tutors?"
The humiliated charity rep, completely beaten, says, "I'm so sorry, I had no idea."
And the lawyer says, "So... if I didn't give any money to them,
what makes you think I'd give any to you?"
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